Anticipation

ANTICIPATION, thou art the basest of all!  Those minutes drag by and collapse into hours and as you lose track of time or of the world around you, your mind continues to oscillate in and out of a state of nothingness and emotions progressively change. Waiting for that phone call from a loved one, your mood swings from longing to desperation when an affirmative was all that was needed. Ask a student waiting for his results, the tension building up in anticipation of what his future is about to become. More than anyone, ask a full-term mother in labor, those last few hours of waiting to see how her dream turns out to be. Is the baby fine and healthy, the pain no longer affects her, she is beyond all distress and suffering, eagerly waiting to cradle the fruit of her womb in her arms. This anticipation has a dark side too, one we often neglect. Waiting for people to show up just because you respect time and as they trickle in later, this waiting darkens to annoyance to anger.

Shubham reminded me of a ghazal by Attaullah Khan...

क्यों तू अच्छा लगता है, वक़्त मिला तो सोचेंगे,
तुझ में क्या क्या दिखता है, वक़्त मिला तो सोचेंगे.
सारा शहर शनासाई का, दावेदार तो है लेकिन,
कौन हमारा अपना है, वक़्त मिला तो सोचेंगे.
हम ने उसको लिखा था, कुछ मिलने की तदबीर करो.
उसने लिख कर भेजा है, वक़्त मिला तो सोचेंगे.
मौसम, खुशबू, बाद-ए-सबा, चाँद, शफक और तारों में,
कौन तुम्हारे जैसा है, वक़्त मिला तो सोचेंगे.
या तो अपने दिल की मानो, या फिर दुनियावालों की.
मशवरा उसका अच्छा है, वक़्त मिला तो सोचेंगे.

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आदतन तुम ने कर दिए वादे

आदतन हम ने ऐतबार किया

तेरी राहों में हर बार रुक कर

हम ने अपना ही इंतज़ार किया

अब न मांगेंगे ज़िन्दगी या रब

यह गुनाह हम ने एक बार किया 

                  

                             ............गुलज़ार

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ज़िन्दगी आज कल यूँ कटती जा रही है..

कुछ औने-पौने भागों में बटती जा रही है. 

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Interestingly my being of being punctual often irritates others. Imagine reaching a salon 15 min  early that too when you are the first customer.

एक दिन सिर्फ तस्वीरें रह जाती हैं

एक दिन सिर्फ तस्वीरें रह जाती हैं ,

फिर हम साल दर साल ज़िन्दगी से इतनी आस क्यों लगाये बैठे हैं ?

एक दिन हम भी दीवार पर अपना आशियाँ बनायेगे,

फिर हम इस ज़मीन से इतनी चाहत क्यों किये बैठे हैं?

एक दिन वक़्त रुक जायेगा, घड़ी के हाथ थम जायेंगे, 

फिर हम ज़माने की दौड़ में पीछे रहने से क्यों डर जाते हैं?

Chemistry.com

I recently watched a lecture by Helen Fisher, an anthropologist on The Science Network. Though I dont have the patience to watch something so scientific for such a long duration, it was intriguing enough to keep me glued to the spot. After all the topic was 'find out why we are addicted to love', a thought which will always have questions. It made me ponder over all relationships till date, my role in them and  my attitude towards the next person during that period and most importantly when it was over.

To a new beginning!

I have moved to Salt Lake City, Utah 3 days ago... n it seems like a whole new world. Life seems to be on an adventure trip. Different culture, people, work space...Its all so organized that I feel choked as I am so much used to the chaos back home (India). But luckily there is enough to discover and figure out that I am not feeling home-sick. So to a new beginning!

Cheers!

From an e-mail....

As we grow up, we learn that even the one person that wasn't supposed to ever let us down, probably will. You'll have your heart broken and you'll break others' hearts. You'll fight with your best friend or maybe even fall in love with them, and you'll cry because time is flying by. So take too many pictures, laugh too much, forgive freely, and love like you've never been hurt. Life comes with no guarantees, no time outs, no second chances. you just have to live life to the fullest, tell someone what they mean to you and tell someone off, speak out, dance in the pouring rain, hold someone's hand, comfort a friend, fall asleep watching the sun come up, stay up late, be a flirt, and smile until your face hurts. Don't be afraid to take chances or fall in love and most of all, live in the moment because every second you spend angry or upset is a second of happiness you can never get back.

......................Contributed by Chetna

Totto-chan!

Though I am an addict of philosophical literature, the self-help kinds, this book Totto-chan: The little girl at the window has been an awesome refreshment to my mind. A very unconventional presentation of the feelings of a child by the authoress Tetsuko Kuroyanagi; its her childhood story. And even more I acknowledge Dorothy Britton for the excellent English translation that made this book so famous. The beauty lies in the fact that even in the times of World War II, the period in which the story is laid, there could exist a medium of education so simple and so true that it didnot take away the inherent innocence from the child. While Totto-chan plays in Tomoe (the school) and incessantly rambles with the ever attentive headmaster Mr. Kobayashi who has all the time in the world to listen to children, I somehow trace the missing parts of my own childhood. Most schools, rather all, just believe in imparting bookish knowledge, burdensome study schedules and projects. Our education system omits the sentiments and dreams of childhood. How I wish we were to develop schools which could strive to develop the qualities of mind, body and heart instead of report cards!